The Wiles of Lian Harper

The Wiles of Lian Harper

"Flesh Eating Insect Offspring. The movie about a woman who unexpectedly gives birth to a horde of child sized, flesh-eating cockroaches who devour the staff and residents of a New York hospital."

"They said the movie got banned in Italy, Germany, and Japan!"

Lian Harper looked up at her surrogate grandfather, Oliver Queen, with the burning hope of a child in her eyes. She'd just finish explaining to him about the latest horror movie to be on TV, the one which her dad EXPLICITLY said she couldn't watch.

"What does that mean?" Lian asked, a bit confused about the last part she just recited.

"It means there is no way in Hell you're-" Ollie quickly shut up when he realized he used one of the H words.

"Oooh! You said a bad word!" Lian lectured.

"Cr-I mean, poop, I did." Ollie realized. He already screwed up with Roy, he didn't need to warp his ex-sidekick's kid while he was at it.

"That's okay, Grandpa, I won't tell daddy you did. IF we can watch-"

"Oh no way, little miss." Ollie quickly cut her off. "Blackmail don't work on this old man."

Lian held her breath, then sighed.

"Fine. Daddy did say that movie was too scary for anyone to watch." She narrowed her eyes slyly. "Even you."

"What?" Ollie wasn't sure he heard that last part. "Your dad said what?"

"Yeah, daddy said this movie would probably scar the both of us for life." She said oh-so innocently as she does so well.

"Oh, did he?" Ollie asked smugly.

…

Roy managed to get back home at some time around 3:30 AM. Still dressed as Arsenal and tiptoeing as to not wake his sleeping angel, he was going to check on Lian first when he heard the toilet flushing. Expecting Ollie, Roy was surprised to find-

"Lian?"

"Hey, daddy. Missed you." Lian yawned as she went to hug her dad.

"Missed you too, honey. What are still you doing up?" He asked her.

"Had to use bathroom." She sleepily muttered. "How patrol?" She asked. He shrugged.

"It was alright." He answered as he led her back to her room. "You have fun with Grandpa?"

"Yeah. I asked him if we could watch that movie-"

Roy sighed as he helped tuck Lian back into bed.

"Lian, I thought I told you-"

"Don't worry, daddy. We just watched some old Spongebob episode instead." Lian explained as she sunk her head back onto the pillow.

"Oh." Roy sighed, quietly thanking God and his ex-mentor as he helped pile back on the numerous stuffed animals Lian "needed" to sleep.

"Night, daddy, love you." She said with the last ounce of waking energy.

"Night, angel. Love you too." Roy kissed her on the forehead as he quietly left the room.

Roy found Ollie, his back facing the red-headed archer, in the living room. Staring at the TV.

"Ollie? Hey, Ollie, thanks for not letting her watch the-"

Roy stopped short when he saw how horribly pale his former mentor was.

"Ollie?"

Ollie's lips were trembling and he looked as if all hope and love had been sucked out of his soul by something too horrible to describe in the English language.

"She, you said, movie, too scary, and-"

"Oh God you saw that roach movie, didn't you?"

"They, they just kept coming OUT of her. They don't stop." Ollie kept muttering. "Everywhere. They never-"

Roy was too busy trying to call someone on his cell phone to hear Ollie's rambling.

"Dinah? It's Roy. Yeah, I think Lian broke Ollie."

"Never stop."

"Yeah, again."